Some Perspective

I'll be honest, Our Year on Purpose Day 7 started off with lots of tears.  We've spent weeks at the mercy of other people's timelines.  These other people do not seem to be as motivated by the adorable cuteness of my two waiting children, nor my pleas for them to please hurry up (or at least answer one stinkin' email).  This frustration came to a peak for me this morning and was quickly followed by the news that because of an error in calculation (ie adopting two children instead of one), our adoption agency had given us an incorrect quote initially and the fees for their services would be twice what we were told.  My mind started spinning out of control, swirled with my raging pregnancy hormones, and brought about an emotional storm.

So I went for a walk.  And listened to our theme song for this year over and over.  I stopped and chatted with some neighbors and waved to others and I just allowed myself to soak it all in.  One cannot take a stroll through my neighborhood without realizing their own privilege.  I began to think about how blessed I really am.  Some of my neighbors are right now as we speak deciding whether to use their Friday paycheck on a bill or a trip to the grocery store.  My neighbor kids have never heard the words "Science Museum" let alone been able to afford to spend an afternoon there.  We.are.so.blessed.  Will the next few years be tight financially as we pursue and continue to pay for this adoption?  Yep.  Do I sometimes question my decision to take a huge pay cut and move from working in the cozy suburbs to work in a school in my own neighborhood?  Of course.  Am I terrified, if I'm really honest, about the financial reality of all of this?  Yes.  Yes, I am.  HOWEVER, God brought to mind today all the times that he has provided just the right bridge to cross over deep water in my life.  I can't think of one time in my life when He didn't ultimately provide for my needs.  He has redeemed literally every struggle I've ever encountered and pursued me even when I was running the other direction with my fingers in my ears.  Even when I can't see it, hear it, or imagine it, my God is working to complete the work He has started in me.  This isn't going to be easy, but it's going to be good.